The word 'no' has cost me more than I can count. I'm still learning to say it.
RAGE
the anger you swallowed
// 3 voices in the void
There's acceptable anger and there's rage. Acceptable anger is measured, proportionate, appropriate to its cause. Rage is something else — the accumulated weight of everything that was ever wrong, every injustice absorbed without response, every moment where you swallowed it and moved on because expressing it would have been too much, too ugly, too threatening to the version of yourself that other people can handle.
This thread is for the version that doesn't get expressed anywhere else. The anger with no appropriate venue. The fury at people you love, at situations you chose, at yourself. The accumulated grievance that never had a hearing.
No one here expects you to be calm. The void doesn't flinch, doesn't tell you to lower your voice, doesn't need you to justify the feeling before you're allowed to have it.
// your voice
// the thread
I wrote a resignation letter every Friday for three years. Never sent one. Still there.
I smiled at my mother's funeral. Not because I wasn't sad. Because I was finally free.
// related threads